CasualContracts

Types of Casual Agreements

An overview of the different kinds of casual agreements people make — from FWB arrangements and sugar relationships to roommate deals and creative collaborations.

Types of Casual Agreements

"Casual agreement" is a broad term that covers a surprising range of arrangements. What a friends-with-benefits situation has in common with an informal roommate deal isn't immediately obvious — but both involve two people making promises to each other without a formal legal framework.

Understanding what type of arrangement you're in (or entering) helps you know which considerations matter most, which pitfalls to watch for, and how to structure your agreement effectively.

This guide provides an overview of the most common types of casual agreements, what makes each one unique, and where to find deeper guidance for your specific situation.

Relationship-Based Arrangements

Friends With Benefits (FWB)

What it is: Two people who maintain a friendship that includes a physical/intimate component, without the commitment structure of a traditional romantic relationship.

What makes it unique: The dual nature of FWB arrangements — part friendship, part intimate arrangement — creates tension that's specific to this type. The friendship provides emotional context that purely transactional arrangements don't have, which is both a benefit and a complication.

Key considerations:

  • Exclusivity: Are you both free to see other people? This needs to be stated, not assumed.
  • Emotional boundaries: What happens when one person develops romantic feelings? Having a plan for this is essential — because statistically, it happens more often than not.
  • The friendship itself: If the benefits end, can the friendship survive? Is that something both people want?
  • Communication between meetings: How much contact feels like friendship vs. dating?
  • Exit plan: How do you end the benefits without blowing up the friendship?

Common mistakes: Not discussing exclusivity, letting emotional boundaries blur without acknowledging it, and treating the friendship as expendable when the benefits end.

Deep dives:

Sugar Relationships

What it is: An arrangement between two people where one (typically called the sugar daddy or sugar mommy) provides financial support or gifts to the other (typically called the sugar baby) in exchange for companionship, time, and often intimacy.

What makes it unique: The explicit financial component creates a dynamic that other casual arrangements don't have. Sugar relationships require careful navigation of power dynamics, clear financial terms, and heightened privacy considerations.

Key considerations:

  • Financial terms: Specific amounts, frequency, payment method. Vague terms like "I'll take care of you" lead to mismatched expectations every time.
  • What's expected in return: Companionship? Specific activities? A certain number of meetings per month? Be clear.
  • Privacy and discretion: Sugar relationships often require more privacy than other arrangement types due to social stigma and the parties' personal circumstances.
  • Legal boundaries: The line between a sugar arrangement and illegal activity is important to understand. See keeping arrangements legal.
  • Power dynamics: Financial asymmetry creates inherent power imbalance that needs to be actively managed.

Common mistakes: Vague financial terms, using money as leverage for things outside the agreement, neglecting privacy discussions, and not setting clear exit terms.

Deep dives:

Open Relationship Agreements

What it is: Partners in an existing relationship create agreements about seeing other people — establishing rules, boundaries, and expectations for non-monogamous activities.

What makes it unique: Open relationship agreements exist within the context of a primary relationship. The agreement isn't just between two people — it indirectly affects the primary partner and any additional partners.

Key considerations:

  • Boundaries with others: What's allowed and what isn't? Emotional connections? Overnight stays? Specific acts?
  • Disclosure rules: What does each partner want to know (or not know) about the other's outside activities?
  • Safety and health: STI testing protocols, barrier use requirements, and how health risks are communicated.
  • Veto power: Can either partner veto a specific outside relationship? How is that handled?
  • Time management: How do you balance time between primary and additional partners?

Common mistakes: Setting rules without discussing the emotions behind them, creating one-sided rules (one partner has more freedom than the other), and not having protocols for when feelings develop with outside partners.

Deep dives:

Casual Dating Agreements

What it is: Two people who are dating without the expectation of it leading to a committed relationship. This might include seeing each other regularly but maintaining independence and the freedom to date others.

What makes it unique: Casual dating occupies the middle ground between a single date and a relationship. The informal nature means expectations are often assumed rather than discussed.

Key considerations:

  • Defining what "casual" means to both people — because it means something different to everyone
  • Whether you're exclusive or free to date others
  • How much integration into each other's lives is expected (meeting friends? attending events together?)
  • How and when you'll revisit whether the arrangement is still working

Common mistakes: Assuming both people define "casual" the same way, avoiding the exclusivity conversation, and letting things drift into a relationship without discussing it.

Deep dives:

Living Arrangements

Informal Roommate Agreements

What it is: Two or more people sharing a living space with agreed-upon terms that go beyond (or replace) a formal lease. This covers everything from rent splits to cleaning schedules to guest policies.

What makes it unique: You're sharing physical space daily, which means every boundary is tested constantly. There's no "time apart" to reset — you live together.

Key considerations:

  • Financial: Rent split, utility costs, shared groceries, and how unexpected expenses are handled
  • Space: Private vs. shared areas, storage, parking, and who gets what
  • Lifestyle: Noise levels, cleanliness standards, sleeping schedules, working from home
  • Guests and partners: Overnight guests, frequency, notice requirements
  • Conflict resolution: How do you handle disagreements without making the living situation toxic?
  • Exit terms: What happens when someone wants to move out? How much notice? What about the security deposit?

Common mistakes: Assuming cleanliness standards are universal, not discussing guest policies, failing to address noise and schedule differences, and not having clear financial tracking.

Deep dives:

Creative and Professional Arrangements

Informal Business Partnerships

What it is: Two or more people working together on a business venture without a formal partnership agreement or incorporation.

What makes it unique: The stakes can be high — intellectual property, revenue, and professional reputation are all on the line. But the informality means there's often no documentation until something goes wrong.

Key considerations:

  • Ownership: Who owns what's being created? How is ownership split?
  • Revenue and expenses: How is money handled — both incoming and outgoing?
  • Decision-making: Who has final say? Is it collaborative or does one person lead?
  • Time commitment: What's each person expected to contribute?
  • Liability: If something goes wrong, who's responsible?
  • Exit: What happens if one partner wants out?

Common mistakes: Not discussing IP ownership from the start, assuming equal effort means equal contribution, and not planning for the scenario where one person wants to leave.

Deep dives:

Creative Collaborations

What it is: Two or more people collaborating on a creative project — music, art, writing, video, podcasts, etc. — without a formal contract.

What makes it unique: Creative work involves both practical contributions (time, skills, resources) and subjective ones (ideas, creative direction, artistic judgment). Valuing and dividing creative contributions fairly is inherently challenging.

Key considerations:

  • Ownership of the final product: Joint ownership? Divided ownership? Based on contribution?
  • Credit: How is each person credited publicly?
  • Revenue: If the work generates income, how is it split?
  • Creative differences: How are disagreements about the work itself resolved?
  • Publishing and distribution: Who controls how and where the work is shared?

Common mistakes: Assuming that working together means sharing ownership equally, not discussing credit and attribution, and having no plan for when creative visions diverge.

Deep dives:

Service and Exchange Arrangements

Skill or Service Exchanges

What it is: Two people exchanging services without money — one person does web design in exchange for photography, one person provides tutoring in exchange for meal prep, etc.

What makes it unique: Without money as a common denominator, it's easy for one person to feel the exchange is unequal. "I spent 10 hours on your website and you cooked me three dinners" can feel imbalanced even if both parties initially agreed.

Key considerations:

  • Defining the scope of each person's contribution clearly
  • Setting timelines for delivery
  • Agreeing on quality standards (or at least a process for feedback)
  • Handling situations where one person delivers and the other doesn't

Common mistakes: Not defining scope, assuming equivalent effort means equivalent value, and not having a plan for non-delivery.

Personal Loan Agreements Between Friends

What it is: One friend lends money to another without going through a formal lender.

What makes it unique: Money and friendship mix poorly without structure. The lender may feel uncomfortable asking for repayment. The borrower may feel the friendship entitles them to flexible terms. Both are recipes for destroyed friendships.

Key considerations:

  • The specific amount and repayment schedule
  • Whether interest is charged
  • What happens if the borrower can't pay on time
  • Whether the loan is documented in writing (it should be)
  • How the loan affects the friendship dynamic

Common mistakes: Not putting terms in writing, being too generous with terms out of friendship and then resenting it, and letting the loan linger unaddressed.

Deep dives:

Choosing the Right Framework for Your Arrangement

Not every arrangement fits neatly into one category. Some are hybrids — a roommate who becomes a FWB, a sugar relationship that evolves into a creative collaboration, a business partner who becomes a romantic partner.

When arrangements cross categories, the considerations multiply. You might need to address financial terms AND creative ownership AND emotional boundaries AND living space boundaries — all in the same agreement.

The key principles apply regardless of type:

  1. Be specific about what you're agreeing to. See the setting expectations hub for frameworks.
  2. Put it in writing. Even a simple document beats a verbal understanding. See the writing your agreement hub for how.
  3. Address power dynamics. Every arrangement has them. Acknowledge and manage them. See the power dynamics hub.
  4. Plan for the ending. It will happen. Make it graceful. See the ending arrangements hub.
  5. Protect privacy. Whatever type of arrangement you're in, privacy matters. See the privacy hub.

Your Arrangement Type Checklist

Before entering any casual arrangement:

  • Identified which type(s) of arrangement you're entering
  • Reviewed the key considerations specific to your arrangement type
  • Discussed the unique risks of your arrangement type with the other person
  • Read the relevant deep-dive articles for your arrangement type
  • Addressed the common mistakes specific to your arrangement type
  • Created a written agreement that covers the relevant areas
  • Planned for regular review of the arrangement's terms

This guide provides general information about different types of casual agreements. Each arrangement is unique, and the guidance here should be adapted to your specific circumstances. This is not legal advice.

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